I've always wanted to have one of those little pull down screens with a pie chart projection showing some random US statistic. I'd carry it around with me, hide it in my pocket, and use the words "statistically speaking" as often as i could. But statistically, the chances of that being possible are 1 in 180,000.

They say 97% of people use just 3% of their brains. An average of 2.7% of people use .526% of their brains. Statistically speaking, the rest goes down the drain.

Statistically speaking, 63% of all Chinese Restaurants in college towns get over 80% of their profits from college kids. 70% of those college kids order take-out, while the other 30% just order in.

Statistically speaking, I could go on all night, but then again, 56% of statistics are made up on the spot.