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I was sitting in the car as he accelerated the vehicle. His old buick was moving rather quickly down the road as he released the steering wheel. "Do you trust me?" he asked. I replied, "No....I don't...." He looked sad, we'd only known each other for a few days, and had been dating two days less. He couldn't have known that i had issues with trust, but I didn't wish to make him feel bad about himself. He told me to sit next to him on the bench seat. I insisted, 'But the seatbelt..." He shrugged and attempted to navigate the harsh curves with his knees. I felt terrible ... almost afraid.... It was odd....because I also liked the accelerated heart beat, the blood rushing through my veins... it was glorious while being perfectly frighteningly. "Fine..." I said at last and sat beside him. He draped one arm over my shoulders, leaving the second to drive. I relaxed and let my head rest on his shoulder. "See...that wasn't too bad, now, whas it?" How could I tell him that it was awkward....It wasn't bad, but there was something missing.
I was an "accelerated reader" at my primary school. I had read the entire school reading library by the middle of year 3 (around age 8) and I was busy devouring the acctual school library, which I finished late into Year 4. From then on reading was a joy, while the rest of the class was reading about "The Trials Against The Wind" in which some kid kept getting his shit blown away, I was reading Beasts In Velvet and enjoying crazed warrior monks fantasing about the ritual rape of hookers. Joy.
When I was in second grade, I was in a sort of elementary school honors class. Those classes were called the ELP classes. To this day, I'm not sure what ELP stood for. Whenever I asked a teacher, she'd say "Accelerated Learning Program".