Paranoid

Truths:

No one is coming into the room just to open your drawers so they can piss you off.

No one would bother stealing ONLY your hairspray.

No one has been eating your food while you're gone.

No one really cares about you enough to make the effort to do any of the above.

Get over yourself!

I am.

I leave the porch lights on from dusk til dawn. I am grateful for the two chain locks that the previous occupant installed on both the front and back doors and I use them every night. We have an alarm system that monitors each door and window. The two doors that lead to the basement have swinging-pointy-things-into-metal-loops type locks.

If someone walks into the other room, and I think I hear them talking, but it sounds too muffled, I think they've fallen into another dimension. When the TV makes the feedback noises most TVs make when cellphones ring, I freak out. I feel like a dog, eyes rolling crazy in my skull from fear, teeth bared, ears pulled back, trying to escape that horrible noise.

Hell for me will be drills and feedback, strange chewing noises on the answering machine, and whispered words hidden in the swish of a ceiling fan. My eyes never mess with me. It's always my ears.

I hate it.