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I'm almost concerned he'll leave me. He told me earlier he's worried what would happen to me if we ever broke up, but at least he said if. I just don't think I'm ready for that right now. I wander, however, if he's thinking about it. I have one of two feelings towards the issue : first, I would be free to do what- and whoever I choose, but at the same time I would be very sad because I've noticed lately that I'm thinking of places where I would like to work that he could work too, or at least in the same city/area. I asked him and forced him to tell me earlier where he sees himself in 10 years. He said exactly what I've been thinking for myself : finishing up whatever schooling needs left to be done (me because I want a masters and a PhD), working at a good job either here in the states or abroad, and starting a family. The only differentiation was I want a kick-ass house which I would have fully decorated and nested to my comfort level and I'm not over specific about the family bit...I just want to be settling down in 10 years. I wander if he and I would make it though, but I also wander if he's planning to leave me on religious grounds. He's catholic and I'm .... I'm more natural, I believe in natural spirits and that there is a higher power, but I don't think it's going to condemn me to hell for being a bisexual, or for having sex before marriage (though my wonderful Catholic never complains) or any of the other sins that could cast me amongst the fallen. I almost hope that it winds up being the two of us who live together and start our lives together and end them together. I don't want him to leave
I can't leave you. Any of you. It hurts my heart to leave you. It hurts me to the point where water leaks from my eyes, caressing skin. I can't leave you. Please, don't make me.
But I ave to leave for New York. You'll only be a drive... six hours away.
Please... I plead with you. Don't abandon me... abandon us...
My best friend is going to be 11 hours away, six is nothing. Please don't leave me.
The thought of even being that far away from you, from everyone has gotten me, an opamist, into shambles. Please don't make it just this much harder because you'll let go.