Urge

Why do I sometimes suddenly have the urge to kiss him? I can't even really say that I'm attracted to him, though I will admit that he is not bad to look at. I don't know besides that. He's younger than I am, by about three years. That alone is strange, seeing as I generally go for older guys. We don't even really have anything in common, so I don't know where this is coming from. And as I said before, I don't actually like him. I just think he would be a great kisser. Another strange things, as I am not the type to just have random flings... the fact that I almost seriously consider just kissing him and walking away sometimes is very unusual for me.

For another thing, he has a girl. And even though I don't know her, I would never do that to her.

Besides, kissing him would have all sorts of consequences. We are around each other too much, have too many close friends in common. If I did go out of my mind and decide to kiss him one day there would be a lot of controversy to deal with...

Maybe that's another reason that it appeals to me... a kind of rebellion among my general conformance, an unallowable act...

Have you ever found yourself walking down a darkened side street cars rushing past you on either side fighting the urge to jump into oncoming traffic not because you have a death wish but just to break up the monotony of it all.

Just to make that red eclipse and Honda CR-V swerve to the side maybe hitting me maybe crashing into one another who really cares as long as they're forced from the safety of their vehicle, forced to face one another in anger or relief or fear or all three all at once.

Anything at all to bring back that human connection we go out of our way to avoid.

I don't know maybe I'm just bored.