Tidbits

Sometimes I have thoughts that I don't think are quite fully formed enough for ether, or I don't have a good thoughtword for them, but I like them anyway.... so I've collected them into tidbits of my life... whee.

I stared at the mist on the river through the chain link fence with longing. It called up a deep seated lonliness, as though the natural calm of the scene settled my soul just enough for me to peer into its depths and discover a hole there.

Sometimes it's convenient to have oldies songs linked to so many random phrases in my mind. I just started working up a good lonly depression and I thought "here we go again" which cued up a perky oldies song. Thank you mental ipod. You make distracting myself a breeze.

Sometimes when I act strangely (or think I'm acting strangely) around others (Oh god I hope he doesn't notice my heartbeat speed up.... Oh god I hope he doesn't think I'm an idiot lunatic with a schoolgirl crush on him... cause I don't have one... anymore... really... frig) I just want to appoligize and explain to them. "I'm sorry, I'm just a strange shy awkward girl who veels even more shy and awkward around attractive, nice, intelligent, confident guys."