Better

It's strange and terrifying to be doing better, instead of worse, and to have no self-defeating plans in place. I usually go ahead and fuck up, so I can get back to doing terrible. Which I'm good at.

I'm not quite sure what's wrong with me at the moment.

There's an event going on in the Student's Union tomorrow, a 'gaming extravaganza' to raise money for the Childs Play charity - a charity which holds a very dear place in mine and my boyfriend's hearts, but anyway - and I'm trying to decide what to wear. Currently I'm thinking a jersey print dress, tights, those killer boots I bought the other day and my blazer/top that just dresses every outfit up in a casual, grown-up sort of way. Nothing too dressed up obviously - this is a student thing after all - but enough to show up the eternally sloppily-dressed bitch who's running the thing.

I know I have this mad hate-on for her and I know every guy around is sick of hearing about it(the girls all agree and join me for a good bitching now and then) but for some crazy reason it is very important to me to be able to show that I am better than her in every way.

I am more talented than her, I am more accomplished than her, I am more mature than her, I am sexier and slimmer than her, I dress better than her and most of all I am happier than that miserable bitch that just sits around moaning about life being SO HARD.

Every time I start feeling down I remind myself of this. And you know what? It works.