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I want to be a happy, normal, playful, chipper, twenty-something year old mother. Instead I'm on too many meds, aggravated and angry at life because I can't raise my daughter in a normal way, or at least the way I want to.
Without something being irreparably destroyed in the process.
If someone could explain a few things to me, that would be nice. Why, after splitting with me, are you being so cruel? You left me. And I didn't do anything. I stayed here, tonight, so you could call me. I could have gone to a party with a warm, loving, caring, emotionally open friend who is willing to share anything from a hug and a shoulder to cry on to rockstar sex. But no. I stayed here. So you could call. And you didn't. I called you once. The old voicemail was up. I called you an hour later. You'd replaced it. So you had time to do that, but not to call me when you gave me your fucking word that you would. Worst of all, it hurts. I'm not just pissed, I'm hurt.
I just want to sleep. That really isn't too much to ask. Please let me fall asleep. I'm not even asking to dream here just some sleep. Just let me close my eyes and drift away for a little while just three hours! Three hours just enough time to recharge and I promise I'll get back to what I was doing......day two and I really, really, really, really need some sleep.