Respect

One thing I wish people understood or respected about me: I'm not anti-social just because I don't need a ton of friends or because I enjoy lots of "me time". I am an only child, a natural introvert and perfectly content to keep a small circle of close friends. I enjoy my personal space because it's drama free!! Respect my need for space please!

One of the most profound things I have ever been told was that respect is earned. You don't have to respect someone just because of who they are. For them to get your respect they have to give it back to you. However, you should give them the common curtesy, but you don't have to respect them.

It bothers me that the word "tolerance" is used in phrases like, "religious tolerance", "exercise tolerance of gays", "political tolerance". It seems like the ideology of political correctness in the US is more focused on creating the appearance of respect than actual respect.

Fuck that. I say compassion is more important than looking good. It's more important than political capital.

Whenever anyone asked me to define love, respect was the first thing that came into my head. Because I like respect far more than I like warm squishy feelings and undying devotion. It's more tangible, and more weighty, and more useful. And more rare. In our society, we've been raised on "respect everyone" and we say we do, but we don't. We can respect others' choices, and we can respect others' ideas, but rarely do we really respect other people. At least, I don't. And I hope everyone else is the same way. And that's how I define the people I love. If someone I love says something strange, I sit there and wait for them to qualify the statement, knowing that it will eventually make sense. I don't dismiss them the way I mentally dismiss everyone else. I hope everyone else is dismissing me the same way, because otherwise, I don't know how I'd live with myself. Deep down, I think that everyone that isn't a person I love is fundamentally flawed, evil or stupid, or maybe with their priorities in the wrong order. It isn't a conscious thought, or a generalization I'd ever speak, but I always assume the worst whenever they open their mouths.

And that's what love is for me. Elevating someone to a point above the rest of the world. Respect.

Respect me for who I am Respect me for who I’m trying to be Hold my hand in the dark Hold my hand in the day Kiss me in public Smile at me at home Let me know that I’m not just another one, Just a side tracked mind slip. Dance with me as if she wasn’t there Look at me like you care Let me know that it’s through Just let me first, have the best of you. Please don’t talk about her while were in bed Don’t tell me you don’t love her, but me instead Do you remember when you thought I was dead? The first thing that came into your head? I thought maybe that would change us some how, But sense you found out it wasn’t me, It didn’t change a damn thing I can replay your voice in my head, scared, depressed, emotions unsaid Then you realized it wasn’t me, and all you thought about, didn’t change a thing The list you made of things we’d do, if I had another day with you Crumpled up on your floor, it doesn’t matter anymore If history repeats itself, lets not make the same mistakes again, How am I to see where I’m going, If I can’t see where I’ve been. If the only way to get over you fear of falling is to jump, Then I just hope my parachute will open…

I still feel completely unresolved, like a gin and tonic missing it’s straw, its almost there Almost complete, but it’s just not the way I like to dink my drink. Just tell me today, tell me soon, your staying with her, just one world will do. I don’t want to be pulled back and forth anymore, “an accidental touch” an uneasy stare, I don’t want to hear, “she’s not suppose to be here” anymore So please don’t look at me that way anymore, please don’t kiss me, I can’t bare the touch, it’s All just a bit, a bit too much. I’d never let you see that deep inside the reason I’d pull back, and Just tell you some lie, was I knew when you’d leave I’d feel like I’d cry. Just a few tears that slip out On their own, trying to forget where you would go. I don’t think you really meant to hurt me in anyway, but what did expect, it’d all be the same? So lets just leave, I’ll tell you were cool, but that’s the end, I’m done with you…