Jail

"Me Getting Arrested and Going to Jail For the First Time" (a play in three acts) ACT I: Innocent Exploration Scene 1: My friend and I go to see Star Wars: Episode III. Scene 2: Walking home, we take a walk around my old middle school. Scene 3: Uh-oh. Looks like those cops disapprove of us wandering around here after-hours. Let's go talk to them and explain ourselves. ACT II: The Right To Remain Silent Scene 1: Thrown to ground, possessions taken out of pockets and placed on roof of cop car, cuffed and tossed into backseat. Scene 2: Locked in the backseat of a cop car, while all of the cops and vehicles scatter. Sound of sirens and an assault rifle in the distance. 45 minutes later, cops return to take me to jail. Scene 3: Answering questions, mugshot, fingerprints, now get your ass in that cell. ACT III: Prisoner Scene 1: Other occupant of cell gets taken out after a few minutes. I wonder when they're going to tell me how long I'll be waiting in here. Scene 2: Hours and hours and hours. Alone. Too cold to sleep. Teeth chattering. Would exercise, but floor is covered in what seems an awful lot like piss. Scene 3: Crappy food served for breakfast. Waiting for hours and hours. It suddenly dawns on me that several of my possessions, including an expensive cell phone and sentimental pocket knife, were left on the roof of the cop car and are probably now irretrievable. Scene 4: Through window, I see my friend leave. I wonder if they're going to let me go anytime soon too. Or at least tell me how long I'll have to wait. Scene 5: About nine hours later, I feel like I should speak up. They tell me that I can bail myself out. I do, go into debt, and leave just shy of 24 hours after I got there. Coming soon, "Discovering That Trespassing On Public Property Not Only Is A Crime, But It's A Felony, Which Is Ironic Because Trespassing On Private Property Is Only A Misdemeanor, But Anyway I Better Get A Good Lawyer Because This Is A Really Really Stupid Thing To Go To Prison And Lose My Scholarships Over" (a one-act play)