Straightuptruths

1. Adults lie

2. You will become one of those lying adults whether or not you want to.

3. Magic is not real and no matter how hard you try you cannot explode someones head with your mind.

4. But spontaneous combustion is real.

5. Daydreaming is the best coping mechanism.

1>No matter what situation I put myself into, I feel trapped.

2>I miss everyone I've ever loved. This is an obvious recurring theme, if you haven't been around this site for three years. I'm worried I'm actually going t6o die of heartbreak. Maybe that's what old people die of. Would it be considered suicide?

3> I'm ashamed now.

4> I hurt more on your behalf than mine.

5> I now feel like I deserve the worst, and it's worrying me a little.

If my mom weren't so in love with her fiance,

I would seriously consider throwing him down the stairs.

As it is, I could never hurt my mom like that.

1. I'm loosing faith in people. I think it's a good thing though. It's a lesson for me.

2. In a general sense, I'm learning to let go. I'm letting go of built up frustrations. I'm letting go of grudges. I'm letting go of resentment. I'm letting go of sadness.

3. I'm refusing to let the realization hit me that I'm going to be leaving all of them. I can't deal with it yet, and I don't know how I'm going to deal with it when the time comes.

4. I'm happier now than I was a few of months ago.

1). I'll never measure up.

2). I can't get over it.

3). I let one person in the last four years get to know me. I was too burned from the last person I let in to lower my gaurd for the general public. Guess what... I got burned again. 2 layers of second degree burns do not feel pleasent.

4). It's not what you said it woud be.

5). I'm happiest when I'm working... and away from my friends.

I'm afraid that my aunt will die before I can see her one last time.

She didn't wake up today.

I've shut my self off to feeling sad about it, because I don't have time.

Randy Pausch is a man I admire and am grateful for hearing his lessons.

That life is fair in all circumstances.

The will to live is paired closely with the will to follow your dreams.

That we have the ability and power to achieve our biggest dreams.

That life is an adventure.

That I am imperfect, and loving my imperfection.

That my short-tempered knee-jerk reactions to stupidity is not necessarily a bad thing, but one that is holding me back from accomplishing better things.

This spring break has been amazing, not living in solitude, but enjoying the company of my family.

I have the greatest niece in the world.

I want to strive to be my best everyday that I am here and anything less is a waste of my time.

Time is the most precious thing.

If one can manage to cry, scream, and laugh everyday you have lived a full life.

You are old when your dreams turn into regrets.

That life is full of limitless possibilities, ones that you can fulfill and explore with yours and those around you's strength.

That smiling is easiest to do when you mean it.

That life is too damn short to be upset at the petty things in life.

That this list of staightuptruths is easiest to write, when you feel good about yourself.

1. I look at your picture everyday to see if I've gotten stronger

2. most of the time I feign apathy, it kills me that you're hurting

3. I fuck for attention

1. Although I pretend to be, I'm not over him or anything that happened.

2. I'm not as confident as I pretend to be.

3. I say that I don't care anymore, but it bothers the fuck out of me that you could do something like that to me.

I have a lot more, but I thought three would be good enough.

1. Sometimes I think that sticking to my good morals isn't worth it. Sometimes I wish I could just let go and do something wild, passionate, forbidden.

2. It bothers more than I let on that my brother won't talk to me right now.

3. I hate being alone. I desperately need people to accept me, though I pretend that it doesn't matter.

4. Sometimes I hate my roommate, but I am incapable or confronting her about it.

I'm sure there is a whole lot more, but nothing comes to mind right now...

so in looking over my posts i see a lot of pretty words and over developed thoughts. it occured to me that sometimes you should just write the straight up truth and not color it with fluff and poetry. truth #1) i am sleeping with a girl who says she loves me

truth #2) i talked myself into loving her back but when i wake up next to her i kinda wish she were someone else

truth #3) i am incredibly lonely

truth#4) i have a friend named Allen whose girlfriend just broke up with him. he whines and complains about it every day. i feel bad for him, i do, but i think that its time to stop trying to get her back into his life and realize she doesnt love him any more. no, they cannot be "friends" and they absolutly cannot sleep together again just because he misses her. he doesnt blog so i know he wont see this. i certainly cant go up to him and tell him to pull himself together. as a result i am forced to hold him and tell him it will be alright every time he takes it into his head to go see her and she doesnt beg for hiim back.

truth #5) i hate my major and would love to drop out of school and just GO. just go somewhere else. anywhere. i want to see everything.

truth #6) i think i am going to tell her i can t see her any more. its not fair to her that i dont want to be with her forever.

truth #7) then again maybe i really do want to be with her forever.

im sure there are a billion more truths i could write but i dont know if now is the time for me to reveal them, even to myself. anyone else have some truths they want to get off their chests?