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I'm gay again. I spent maybe a month being gay almost two years ago. It's different now. Last time it was because I was fed up with girls. There is no reason I should have to explain this one... girls are girls. That's it. Now it's because I can't dissociate sex and love. The idea of fucking a girl other than the one I love really bothers me. But having thought about it for a while, the idea of fucking a guy doesn't bother me at all. Even though she has said she would fuck me with a strap-on, though that was a joke and a taunt. But she does have a strap-on, so if it does end up happening, awesome for me. I guess it amounts to, in my heart I know I'm not gonna end up with a guy, because... girls are girls. But right now I don't wanna be with any girl but superbestfriend. So that leaves me with only one option: promiscuous gay sex.
It's this mentality that is really fucked up when it comes to homosexuality.
Sorry, but there's no off-on switch. You're either gay, or you're not. Either is acceptable.
I'm gay by proxy. It bothers me to think about having sex with a woman I don't love, or like quite a bit. But not with a man for some reason. So when it comes to the hookup scene, I am gay.
I'm sorry, but still. It's not something that is "by proxy" or whatever you want to call it.
Either you love and are physically attracted to women, or you love and are physically attracted to men.
If you're married to a woman, and sleeping with men on the side (or vice versa)....I'm sorry, but that means you're homosexual (or vice versa). It just means that you can't fully accept your identity.
You might have strong attachments to someone who is not family, and feel a love and compassion for them, but if you're not sexually attracted to that person, but you're attracted to someone with the opposite genitalia....it means you're attracted to that type of person, therefore defining your sexual orientation.
So bisexuality no longer exists?
Never did in my book.
I think many, many people on here would beg to differ.
Yeah. There's such a thing as bisexuality, as well as sexual inclinations that change and develop over time. That's a really strange thing to accuse people of being wrong about.
Not everyone believes in God. Not everyone believes in bisexuality. And believe it or not, not everyone believes in homosexuality either. (I'm gay, jsyk.)
Get over it. If you're bisexual, good for you. I'm glad you find yourself capable of loving both genders (I, for one, see it as an excuse not to find "one" person you can fall in love and stay in love with.) Bisexuality is, imho, similar to polygamy, another thing I don't believe in.
I'm sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. My comments are so rude, so offensive. Unlike the poster's thoughtword. But nobody seems to be bothered by that. Unless you're confusing it with a cigarette, which is obviously not what the poster meant when they used the thoughtword.
It's not that your comments are offensive. It's that they're stupid.
"I'm gay again."
My "stupid" comments stemmed from stupidity.
Again, there is no on-off switch. You are straight. gay. bi. You're not "today i'm gay, tomorrow i'm straight, and on thursday i'm bi."
You can say I'm stupid for discovering that at this point in my life I am not attracted to women, but that doesn't change the fact that at least one of your stated opinions is not so much an opinion as a blatant falsehood.
"My "stupid" comments stemmed from stupidity. "
Yes, yours. Or if not your stupidity, then ignorance.
Bisexuality has been used as a term to describe sexual orientation (as in preference of sexual and / or rom andantic relationships) since 1914 or so. There are tons of examples of bisexuality in various cultures throughout history.
Ever hear of the Kinsey Scale? It's relevant here because the data used for it was gathered through peoples self-evaluation in a period of time in which homosexuality, let alone bisexuality, was far from being socially acceptable.
"(I, for one, see it as an excuse not to find "one" person you can fall in love and stay in love with."
This smacks of either a willing ignorance of the people around you, a willing never-questioning what your parents told you, a refusal to stop being bitter because someone who was bisexual dumped you, or just a lack of varied life experience. I don't know if any of those actually apply to you, but if I had to guess I'd say it's probably that last one.
Some people (hetero, homo, and bisexual people at that)just don't want to fall in love with "one" person. Some people (again, from all flavors of sexual orientation) do. Those two preferences are only linked by subject matter - they're independent of one another, although they probably do share some similarities in what they take as influences as they develop.
Implying that all bisexual people just don't want to fall in love with "one" person would be employing the same logical fallacy that implying that there was no such thing as a monagomous heterosexual or homosexual couple. That's clearly false.
Human sexuality is a complicated thing. There are people that are sexually attracted to feet - hell, on reddit today there was a self-post by some girl who discovered that she got intensely turned on by the navigation buttons in Firefox 3, but only if they were both green. Seriously, she had to go wank at work. Her husband thinks it's kinda creepy.
It's not like there's some fucking toggle switch in peoples brains that governs what they're attracted to sexually that's confined to two fucking options - male or female.
While I wouldn't doubt that there is some biological influence on ones sexual preference (now there's another can of worms, oh boy. At least we're getting close to understanding the brain in full), I'm also pretty sure that a lot of human sexual attraction gets formed at a higher-level of abstraction.
Human sexual preference, like most other at-least-partially-arbitrarily
-governed-by-random-chance things about people, maps much closer to a bell curve from homosexuality to heterosexuality than ... I don't know a pair of devil horns or whatever the graph for your not-very-well-thought out ideas about why people feel attracted to what they do.
In short, fuck you.
(Don't feel bad though, there's a way to turn those fuck yous upside-down! It's called thinking about what you think. Also, reading! Try it! I know you've got internet acess!)
FURTHERMORE I DECLARE ROMANDANTIC AND ALL OTHER TYPOS AS INTENTIONAL AND ALSO AWESOME.
Seriously? Even a bisexual person can see how ignorant "I'm gay again" is.
I don't believe in bisexuality. I've never been romantically or sexually involved with a bisexual person, nor do I ever intend to. Just like I don't intend being romantically or sexually involved with a heterosexual person.
I also don't think that someone is going to fall in love with one person. Most heterosexuals for example, were married before or even engaged. Not everyone "waits until marriage" either. Feel free to have multiple partners over the years - just not all at the same exact time. Last time I checked, that's called cheating.
Also, feel free to be bisexual. I honestly don't care. Some of my friends are bisexual. They're living their life. I'm living mine. Maybe saying I don't believe in that sexual orientation upsets you, but you must understand that I don't have to agree with everything you say.
The world doesn't have synonymous views on every single topic. Abortion. Gay marriage. Etc.
Call me ignorant all you want. It's not going to go anywhere, though. I've done a lot of debating and research on this topic, and I've made my opinions.
What exactly are you attempting to do, make me see that you exist and can love a man and a woman? I do. Unless you're a bot, but I doubt that.
You seem to be trying to make the same point over and over again, and it's not be working because you don't explain it very well and no one's on the same page as you.
get over it, people. idc that you think i'm a horrible person for not agreeing with you. and i'm sure you don't give a crap that i feel this way. so let's finish this now.
I'm particularly baffled that someone is knowledgeable enough to work a keyboard and not enough to acknowledge that bisexuality and polygamy are real things, not just some made-up fantasy. It might not be part of your world, but it's part of the world that millions of other people share, and they'll gladly step up to tell you that it's not fiction.
I really suspect that everyone here is just feeding a troll that is more inclined toward provoking crowds with uninspired attempts at satire than guilty of genuine, astonishing ignorance.
But since we're all here and worked up into a tizzy, I pose these questions.
While we're professing not to believe in other people feeling things that we don't ourselves feel, I'd just like to profess that I don't believe in bisexuality either. Or homosexuality. Or heterosexuality! Being attracted to entire genders is merely an excuse not to find the one person who will rescue you from a dragon in exchange for your hand in marriage and half your father's kingdom.
I also do not believe in fetishes, because in English, objects that are not people are not given genders, and therefore it is impossible for a sexual orientation to include them, even if sexual orientations existed (which they don't, because I say so!). All those people who think they have kinks and fetishes are really just stupid.
This means, of course, that 99% of Ether also does not exist, including this thread. You are all merely figments of your own confused, fucked up mentalities.
this thread is way better if you replace every instance of bisexual or bisexuality with cheese.
"So cheese no longer exists?"
"Not everyone believes in God. Not everyone believes in cheese."
"I don't believe in cheese. I've never been...involved with cheese, nor do I ever intend to."
... I was completely prepared to leave a very angry comment, until I read the comment that says to replace "bisexuality" with "cheese."
Now I can't even remember what my angry comment was going to be.
I can't believe this is still getting commented on. I don't agree with bisexuality. I have that right. I also don't believe in dragons. I also have that right. If you do, fine? I'm just stating my opinion. Feel free to state yours. Maybe this is all coming from how I worded my first comment, but I still stand by it.
Bisexuals, I think you should agree. "I'm gay again" does not make any sense and should actually be perplexing to bisexuals - you're bisexual, you never were gay and you never were straight. You've always been bisexual. It's that fucked up mentality, that your sexual orientation can change at whim, which is really fucked up in my opinion, and causes others (gay-marriage ban supporters, etc) to see the non-heterosexual community as crazy and fucked up. Which I think most if not all of ether would agree is not the case.
Now, on to the questions posed earlier:
Why would people lie about being bisexual or polyamorous? (or to reference your specific example, polygamous) I don't know. I never said anyone did, I just said I didn't believe in/agree with bisexuality. I think these people actually know for certain they are bi. I don't believe in that sexual orientation though, that is to say, I don't agree with their "lifestyle."
Why is it "bad" to "allow" your lover have additional partners, beyond just yourself? In an open relationship, this is fine. I also don't agree with open relationships. I'd like to be in a relationship with one person and them feel the same way. Otherwise, I wouldn't want to be in the relationship. If I'm not all you need, and you feel the need to have another boyfriend (I'm gay), then you're not the boyfriend I want. I don't like this view, but I know it exists.
Are you just terribly insecure about your own sexual identity and the threat that you might get hurt by the scary adult world of relationships if you don't play by the (arbitrarily chosen) rules? Insecure enough, perhaps to openly attack anyone that eclipses your failed attempts at emotional maturity with so much as an innocuous anecdote from his life? No, I'm perfectly fine with my sexuality. I just know for certain what I want out of a relationship. I also know that relationships are not perfect and sacrifices need to be made. I'm also willing, if I truly feel connected to the person, to make those sacrifices and learn from what is thrown at me. I've also not been exposed to the realm of dating for very long, but that doesn't mean I'm immature (emotionally or whatever). Are you insecure to the point where you feel the need to pose questions you believe you know the answers to in an effort to make me feel ignorant (a failed attempt)?
Wouldn't you be happier if you just chilled the fuck out and only applied your personal preferences to your own dating choices? I'm perfectly happy. I also only apply my personal preferences to my own dating choices. I merely stated my opinion (perhaps harshly). I'd like to ask you (maybe all of you) the same question though, since it seems the unhappiness is on your part.
Why is it that you still sound like you are being hopelessly degrading to people who are bisexual (and in doing so, sound like a megadouche)?
Also, "You're [cheese], you never were gay and you never were straight..." ftw.
Because they want my comments to be degrading.
I didn't intend for them to come across that way.
You stated that you didn't think that a sexual orientation that is had by many people around the world even exists - except for as a tool to avoid commitment.
How is that not degrading? Well, I guess it's not literally "lowering in value or social position", as it's more of "ignoring" or "denial". You can't really lower something past not believing in it.
You also stated that you "don't agree with it", which would seem to be at odds with your lack of belief in it. If it doesn't exist, there's nothing to disagree about. If you don't agree with it, fine - lots of people find lots of stuff immoral. I do doubt that you could provide a cogent argument for the immorality of bisexuality though.
I still don't get this use of the word "I don't agree". I think the dude's using it in the same sense as "I think it's icky", as in "Thanks for inviting me to see Transformers, but I don't agree with robots" or "What the hell kind of deodorant did you put on? I totally don't agree with how it smells" or, to tie the joke together, "Thanks for offering me some of your pizza, but I don't agree with cheese." I think the phrase "I don't agree with X" is a really lame cop-out that implies that you have considered the sides of an argument and found the opposing side to be faulty, but it actually just means that something makes you feel icky. Take, for example, bisexuality. It's not an argument. It's not a debate. It's a feeling, and I suppose a physical act, if you want to look at it that way. It makes a bit more sense to agree or disagree with an assertion about bisexuality, such as "there is nothing unethical about engaging in expressions of your sexual attraction to someone with disregard of their gender." Of course, disagreeing with something like that and insisting that anyone who doesn't "pick" between two equally attractive genders and commit to denying their actual sexual preferences for the rest of his/her life is a bad person is... well, to put it diplomatically, a very hard position to argue. And hey, I thought this might be relevant to the discussion. I called up my father today and told him that I wasn't ever going to speak to him again because my mother is pretty awesome and she's all the parent I need. Anyhow, she's outrageously insecure and can only maintain a semblance of emotional security if her loved ones are kept as her own exclusive property, so it was really straining our relationship whenever I would spend time with my dad. But that's healthy and mature, right? I've taken this policy further and severed my ties with all but one friend, acquaintance, sister, child, grandparent, work relation, and mailman. After all, how am I supposed to love one child and tend to its emotional needs when I already have another? It's not like love is an abstract thing that I can apply to everyone that is deserving of it, and like I'm mature enough to be capable of sharing love with someone that I don't 'own'.
I just found this, and wow. I told my cat about it, and he seems very agitated with Limeguy. A hole in Limguy's argument I can't resist pointing out: You said you didn't mean for your statements to be degrading, but people were taking them that way, implying that it was their fault for being so sensitive or whatever. YOU took offense to 'fag' and 'I'm gay again," didn't you? I took that statement more as a comment on where his sexuality is focused at the time. I know I shift from more interested in one sex, to another, then back again. Sexuality is an unbelievably complicated thing that so many people want to simple, black and white. Argh.